A depressed marriage? What is that?

Just like people can become depressed over the loss of someone they love, the economy or a real estate financial crisis, so too can a marriage suffer from depression.

Depression in marriage, however, does not mean that it is over. Rather, it is a low period in a series of highs and lows which occur in every marriage. Here are some signs of a depressed marriage:

  1. Difficulty making even minor decisions let alone major decisions without an argument.
  2. Intimacy such as hand-holding, sitting close together or kissing becomes more routine (if it exists at all) rather than hear felt.
  3. Lack of desire to spend any time together; prefer to spend free time alone.
  4. One or both has already spoken of getting a divorce or separating.
  5. The excitement in the marriage is completely gone; dont look forward to seeing or hearing from each other.
  6. The conversation is limited to the bare essentials of scheduling, managing the house and checking in. No longer are their conversations about the things of which each feels passionate.
  7. Intentionally avoiding spouse and notice the spouse is also avoiding.
  8. Fantasies of other partners, what would happen if a spouse passes away or the peace that could come from separating begins to consume thoughts.
  9. Finding reasons not to spend the night in bed, not going to bed at the same time or put physical boundaries such as pillows between both parties.
  10. No sex or interest in sex.

Experience of five or more items may indicate a depressing marriage. This time it would be beneficial for a couple to seek counseling to prevent a potential separation or divorce.