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The Exhausted Woman
with Christine Hammond, MS, LMHC

50 Excuses for Why People WON’T Change

Recently, I was speaking about the impact of decision fatigue on our daily lives. Decision fatigue is the deterioration of making good decisions after a long day of decision making. Basically, the more decisions a person makes in a day, the worst the decisions tend to be by the end of the day. This concept is especially important for executives, doctors, attorneys, and other professions that require constant unique, not automatic, daily decisions.

Interestingly enough, while the concept was well received by the audience, the solutions were not. The solutions involve: changing morning and evening routines, eliminating constant reading of emails, taking longer and more impactful breaks, and forming healthy work/life balance habits. The energy of resistance to change in the room was noticeable. Here are some of the excuses expressed about change.

  1. Change isn’t real after all, leopards can’t change their spots.
  2. Change is for other people, I don’t need to do it.
  3. People don’t really change, they just fake it.
  4. Change requires too much emotion and I don’t like to feel that much.
  5. I don’t have the time to change.
  6. Change requires consistency and I’m not consistent.
  7. I don’t know how to change.
  8. Change requires insight and I don’t have that and don’t know where to get it.
  9. I don’t know what to change.
  10. Change is risky, I don’t like taking chances.
  11. I might fail at changing, then what.
  12. Change means confronting things I don’t want to confront.
  13. I’d rather not change, then deal with stuff from my past.
  14. I can move forward without changing.
  15. I can’t change, it’s impossible.
  16. I have tried to change in the past and it doesn’t work.
  17. (Insert name of person) changed and now they are terrible.
  18. (Insert name of person) needs to change, not me.
  19. Change takes too much effort.
  20. If I don’t know all of the outcomes of a change, then I can’t proceed.
  21. If I change then, I can’t blame my spouse, child, or parent when things go wrong.
  22. If I change then, I have to take more responsibility for my actions, thoughts, emotions, and behavior.
  23. If I change then, I can’t project my negativity onto people around me.
  24. If I change then, I have to work harder, smarter, or be more efficient.
  25. If I change then, I might lose all my friends.
  26. If I change then, my family might hate me.
  27. If I change then, I might have to get a different job.
  28. If I change then, I have to learn to communicate better.
  29. If I change then, I can’t say, “It’s all your fault.”
  30. If I change then, the people around me might get upset.
  31. If I change then, I have to set new boundaries.
  32. If I change then, the people who depend on me for everything won’t be able to anymore.
  33. If I change then, others will take advantage of me.
  34. If I change then, I have to reset my expectations of myself and others.
  35. If I change then, I’m admitting that I might be wrong and I can’t stand to be wrong.
  36. If I change then, my daily routines might need to change.
  37. I’m already better than most and don’t need to change.
  38. Change is for weak people.
  39. If I change and show more emotion, then others will avoid me or treat me badly.
  40. If I change and become honest, then I will upset too many people.
  41. If I change and let others know what I’m thinking, then I will be too vulnerable.
  42. Change is too difficult.
  43. Change is painful.
  44. Change means I might be rejected.
  45. My spouse hates change so if I do it, they won’t like me anymore.
  46. Change is for millennials.
  47. Change is uncomfortable.
  48. There is already too much change around me, so I’d rather not.
  49. I hate change.
  50. If I change, I won’t be me.

Everyone falls into the trap of finding an excuse not to change a behavior or pattern in their life. It is natural and normal to be resistant to change. After all, change upsets our internal and external homeostasis. But just as the seasons in year change, so do we throughout our lives. The only question that remains is: Are you going to let others control your change or are you going to be intentional about it?

50 Excuses for Why People WON’T Change

 


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APA Reference
Hammond, C. (2019). 50 Excuses for Why People WON’T Change. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 26, 2019, from https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhausted-woman/2019/05/50-excuses-for-why-people-wont-change/