2 thoughts on “The Psychological Benefits of Less

  • August 3, 2017 at 6:52 am

    I have a piece of furniture that was a part of a bedroom set I had when I was growing up. it is a vanity, 50’s era, with a large round mirror attached to it. My mother and I have been unable to bond all of may life, because of her personality disorder(s). But when I look at this vanity and some other things she bought me, I feel some connection to her, althoughI believe it may be just part of my imagination. This is what makes me doubt myself when I tell myself I have to get rid of it. I guess what I am afraid of, is losing my mom, and maybe even losing a connection to my childhood, and my child self. It is hard for me to part with things of this magnitude. She is elderly now. I know, in some ways, that this conflict is all in my mind, in my imagination, and driven by anxiety. If I got rid of it, it somehow would feel like losing my mother. But I guess many things are like that, because since I never really had’y mother, I imprinted so much of her into each piece of furniture- all of her antique furnishings seem to be imbued with her spirit- the spirit that I used to know her as when she was young and able. Maybe it is also a question of my identity- without this furniture, would this period of time in my life completely disappear from my memories? And if that is the case, who would I become in the future? It is definitely a type of insecurity that is showing through. I am recovering from a narcissistic “relationship”, in addition to childhood traumas, so I have a shaky sense of identity. And so I depend on the furniture to remind me of myself. At least, that’s my estimation of it. Somewhere and somehow, what is important got forgotten and mixed up with what is unimportant. Things became important, which represented what was important. And I’m trying to hold on to what is important, while I feel it sliding out of my hands. Not sure how to establish my identity through trying on different identities, as you suggested in another article act healing form narcissistic abuse. Sounds like what I need to do though.


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