The Recovery Expert
with Sharie Stines, Psy.D.


How to Spot a Child Molester

How do you know when a person is safe for your child to be around?   Answer:  You really can never be 100% sure because pedophiles and other brands of child molesters are master manipulators; but, there are some clues that can be indicators that someone is not safe for your child.

Ways to identify a child molester:

They are more interested in talking to your child than they are in talking to you.
They tend to...


Children with Attachment Based Narcissistic “Parental Alienation Syndrome”

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) is the unhealthy coalition between a narcissistic parent and his or her children against the targeted, non-narcissistic, non-abusive parent.  The innocent or targeted parent receives hostility and rejection from his or her children in this system.  The psychological health of the children is used as arsenal in the narcissist’s twisted world.

Parental Alienation Syndrome is a family systems pathology involving the triangulation of children into the abusive, narcissistic parental relationship.  In the...


Healing from an Addiction (to a Person, Behavior or Substance): Know the Psychological Set-ups for Relapse

What are some of the thoughts and personal self-defeating beliefs that contribute to relapse from addictions?  Here is an overview of some common pitfalls that addicts fall into, psychologically, which contribute to their inability to stay sober. If you are a person trying to overcome any type of addiction, then be aware that you are probably going to face the following mental sabotage strategies created in your mind.  I would like to thank, renowned relapse...


Two Words for Better Parenting

After raising six children, reading many parenting books and attending many parenting classes, I have learned to boil good parenting down to two important words:  (1) enjoy (2) reflect.

The best advice I can give parents today is to enjoy your children.  So often parents lose sight of the gift they have in their children, frequently getting caught up in the everydayness of school, chores, sports, that they forget to stop and look their children in...


Why do narcissists need to think we’re bad?

Narcissists have the uncanny ability to make those closest to them feel defective and bad.  When in a close relationship with one, you will often feel like you have let him or her down in some huge way, “causing” him to feel extremely angry or extremely hurt or both.  The partner or child of the narcissist always ends up feeling as if he or she has somehow failed him – a belief the narcissist thrives...


Healing from the Narcissistic Mother

Suzy recounts her journey through healing after the effects of being raised by a narcissistic mother.  As a child, Suzy thought she was bad and unworthy. She constantly feared rejection and felt hurt and worthless most of the time. She had no idea that something was wrong with her mother and that her problems were not her fault.

She began a healing journey that involved therapy, education, journaling, relationships with affirming people, and detachment from her...


How to fix another person

Do you know people who believe that to help you means to fix you?  Are you one of those people?  In order to want to “fix” someone, we have to believe something is broken, and it’s very difficult to do this without believing that someone is flawed.  When you approach someone with solicitations of help, are you operating out of a misguided attempt to fix them?  If so, you will most likely bring...


Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder Treatment

Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) is a psychopathology, defined as “a preoccupation with orderliness, perfectionism, and mental and interpersonal control, at the expense of flexibility, openness, and efficiency.”  It is a very difficult personality to contend with.


There are a variety of therapies to use to address personality disorders. The one focused on for this article utilizes interpersonal psychology and FAP (Functional Analytical Psychotherapy), which involves using the relationship dynamics between the client and therapist...


Breaking Free from an Abusive Relationship

Following are ten steps to take to break free from an exploitive, abusive, or toxic relationship.  While you may believe that your primary problem is the other person, let me emphasize, your primary prisoner is not another person, but rather, your belief system. Once you can get rid of faulty thinking and allow yourself to think differently, you can begin to heal.  Here are ten steps to take to begin your road to...


Am I in an Abusive, Narcissistic, or Borderline Relationship?

Answer the following questions and see how many you answer "yes" and how many you answer "no" to. The more yes answers, the more likely you are in an abusive , narcissistic, and/or borderline relationship.

My loved one calls me names, such as stupid or worthless, or other equally degrading terms.
My loved one mocks, belittles, or uses a patronizing tone of voice when addressing me.
This person often undermines my authority with...